


Humming Swan Lake

by KiaraNaria



Category: Skip Beat!
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, F/M, Hopefully some fluff
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-08-25
Updated: 2017-10-22
Packaged: 2018-04-17 04:48:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 15,688
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4652901
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KiaraNaria/pseuds/KiaraNaria
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Why does she wear every single colour except white? She seems to be such an innocent creature and white is the colour of innocence, isn't it? /<br/>Totally AU.<br/>Disclaimer: Skip Beat! belongs to the one and only wonderful Nakamura Yoshiki-sensei!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. 1

There she is again.

Dancing beautifully to music that wouldn't reach his ears, in a dress that is matching her motions and he is sure her emotions as well.  
It's always like that. Every day she illuminates her place - even if the sun is still shining, let her long raven hair down or pull it up into a high ponytail - it's either the one or the other, never something else. Then she looks through her closet for a dress - always a dress and no shoes - that would be suitable for her current mood. He saw her in pretty much every color imaginable. Except one. Not even once in all this time he knew she was living in the apartment across from his, was she wearing white. Maybe she simply doesn't like it, but strangely enough he has the feeling there would be more to it. She seems to be such an innocent creature and white is the color of innocence, isn't it?

Today she chose a silky red halter dress - it lies tight around her petite frame, plays loosely around her hips and flows freely down until it ends short above her knees.

Red.

That means a sleepless night for him - again.

She is upset. Why he will never know. But this color means something between dancing and seduction. For him that means no long way to go - at least if she is the one dancing.

The first moment he lay his eyes on her he was captured.

It has been nearly two years since that moment and it wasn't even something worth telling.

He was shopping in the convenience store in the apartment- complex he was living in, looking for something fast and simple to eat.

Someone made this beautiful sound in the aisle next to him. Wondering who would hum swan lake in the middle of grocery shopping, he looked around the corner and saw this bright golden eyes staring right at him. She was still humming as she smilingly nodded at him in greeting and went past him to get to the vegetables. His heart literally skipped a beat.  
He never had the chance to talk with her or even ask for her name. In the moment he came back to his senses, she was already gone.

After that he went more often to that store in hope to see her again, but without any luck.

It wasn't until nearly a month later, as he came early home from a photo- shoot that had to be canceled because of the sudden illness of his fellow model.

It was still bright outside as he looked out of his living room window, not knowing what to do with this unexpected free time.  
Deep in thoughts about his schedule the next days his eyes were suddenly drawn to lights that were switched on in the apartment across and one floor under his own place. Normally he wouldn't look into other people windows, but sudden movements caught his attention and he was soon mesmerized. There in this brightly lit place without any furniture, dancing ballet in a short but elegant black dress was the girl he was looking for for the last few weeks. He was captivated until she turned the lights of - he couldn't get his eyes off of her.

From then on he would look out of his window as soon as he came home.

Sometimes he gets a short glimpse of her before her place falls into the dark completely, on other days he can watch her the whole time - moving to pop- music, hip hop, dancing ballet, jazz- dance, or a few times even break- dance.

Sometimes he feels like a stalker, but what could he do? It would be a shame if this lovely movements would never be seen by another human being - and he could watch her the whole time for the rest of his life.

At the moment she is sitting cross- legged in front of the only item he could see in her supposedly living room - a laptop. He guesses to choose the music. Then she begins her stretching exercises- he is sure some of that movements are really painful. In the middle of bending backwards, touching the floor with her hands and straightening one of her legs right up in the air - who would need something like a spine? - she suddenly jumps back on her feed and takes her phone from the place next to the computer.

He sighs.

There wouldn't be any dancing this night.

Every time she gets a call she turns the lights off and that's it. He has no idea what she is doing or who is calling. Maybe her boyfriend... but he doesn't want to think about that possibility.

Surely the call is from her family or friends. But there are never people with her, as far as he could tell, that is. His hectic schedule doesn't allow him much time at home, but if he is and he gets a glimpse of her, she is always alone.

Then maybe something work related? But which kind of work would require a young, pretty female in the middle of the night? Another thing he doesn't really want to think about. She wouldn't do that kind of work, would she?

The first time he saw her dance he thought she was a professional ballet dancer or something like that. But if she is, then why would she dance at home in the night? Wouldn't she practice with her colleagues in a dance studio all day and go on stage in the evening? That couldn't be it. So if the dancing is only for fun or to keep in shape. Where is she going at such times?

He wants to know it. He wants to know all sorts of things about her. How old she is. Where does she come from. What's she doing - work and such. Her favorite colour, food, movie, music. About her family and her past. Her name... Oh, yeah... That he wants to know the most.

Would he ever have the courage to go and talk to her? But even if, what would he say?

"Hi, you live in the building across from me and I'm stalking you for nearly two years now. What's your name? Do you have a boyfriend?"

Right... that will surely bring her into his arms.

Bring her into his arms?

What's he thinking? He doesn't even know her. Why should he want her at his side?

No.

That's not the right question...

Why should someone want to be at his side?

He doesn't deserve love or happiness. He doesn't deserve anything like that at all. Why would he? It's his fault that his best friend died. If he didn't exist Rick would still be alive and Tina wouldn't have to cry so hard and call him a murderer.

A murderer.

That's what he is and that's why he deserves nothing, but to be alone till the end of his time.

But why is he watching her every time he gets the chance to? Why isn't he simply not looking in her direction and doing something different? Why does he enjoy her little performances so much? Or is it more like torture?

Yeah... that's it. He has to crucify himself by looking at someone who will never be a part of his life.


	2. 2

* * *

"Say, did that author reply to you already?"

"Hmm."

"What did he say?"

"I should read the books and if I still have questions, I'm free to contact him again at any time."

"That doesn't sound helpful."

"No. It's not."

"I will get them for you later."

"No need. The director had sent them to me yesterday."

"Good. I try to make some room in your schedule for you to read."

"No. It's fine. I can read in my breaks or in make-up."

A stern look directing at the driver, Yashiro can't hold it in anymore. "And when are you going to learn your scripts? And eat? And actually rest a bit?" He sighs heavily. "Ren, I don't know what's wrong with you lately, but if you go on like this any longer, you will break down. Even _your_ body won't be able to withstand that much stress forever."

"It's not stress, Yashiro-san. It's the career I have chosen and want to do. Just a little hectic at the moment."

" _Hectic?_ " He retorts. "You are working 18 hours nearly every day for the past," he scans his planner, "three and a half weeks. And the next two weeks are just as tightly packed."

The actor took a second to answer. "I need to get as much done as possible now, so I can fully concentrate on the movie later."

Yashiro had to sigh again - what ever that was, it was the stupidest thing his charge had said in a while. "Showbiz doesn't work that way, Ren. It's not a list you can work through. The more you do, the more they want you to do and you know it."

He doesn't get a response, it's not like he expects one.

Not being able to ignore it any longer, he finally asks what burns on his mind ever since.  
"What happened four weeks ago, Ren?"  
What ever it is or was, something had changed a month ago. It had changed Ren. And not for the better.

Tsuruga Ren always had been a reserved, shielded person, but since that day there was not one single unscripted smile. Not one glare or stern look. He is always friendly and gentlemanly, smiles when he has to and laugh at appropriate moments. But there is not one speck of emotion if it isn't for work. As if he is a walking and talking muppet, existing only to do his job.

His face carefully blank, Ren concentrates on the traffic. He can't answer that question, even if he knew what had happened that time. To her. To him.

But he doesn't know. And so he won't answer.

Something had changed that day. Had made him change. He doesn't want to think about it. Doesn't want to remember. But the more he is trying to forget, the more details he can recall.

What a paradox.

That girl is a paradox.

If he would be alone at this moment, he would have stopped on the side and let his head drop on the steering wheel - he could still recall every single  
moment he had seen her that day.

It had been a wonderful day - sunny, but not too hot. He had had slept fine for once, woken up in a good mood and even had a little appetite. The amount of work was just right, with the right people and enough, but not too many breaks. He even had seen _her_ sitting in a cafe, typing on a phone near one of his on-location shoots right in the city. Who knows, with his good mood and the day being so perfect, he maybe would have had the courage to talk to her. But he had work to do and there was a growing crowd of people around, screaming his name and the names of the other celebrities - this had probably been the only bad thing so far. And even though his sometimes super annoying boss had called him, it was just to give him good news - he had gotten the role in that movie he wanted so badly. His last job had went so well he could go home early and with a little luck, maybe even see her dance.

That day had been good. Really good. You could say he had felt somewhat happy.

Until he had seen her dance.

He came home, got a bottle of water from the fridge and went to the window. _The_ window.

Opening the huge glass panel, he stepped onto the balcony and looked down, he saw her windows being open - they are never open. Not as far as he knew, at least.

She was crouching in front of her computer, strangely enough still in jeans and a light blue shirt - starting some upbeat song. Taking a few steps back, she stood there for a few seconds before she started to move to the beat, but it didn't even take 10 seconds until she stopped and stomped over to the device, changing the song.  
The next thing she did was pulling her jeans off and throwing them away angrily, before she again started to dance - this time ballet to something classical he didn't even try to remember the name of. She danced a little longer, but again stopped in the middle of a move and marched back to the laptop.  
This time it took a while until the piano reached his ears and even longer for her to stir. She moved slowly, a lot on the floor with a few jumps and turns.

But it wasn't as perfect as every other time he had watched her. It seemed injudiciously and emotional, messy even and still the movements fit the music to a tee. He couldn't understand the lyrics - it was sung too slow and soft, except that one line. That line that would haunt him still one month later.

' _Ouch I have lost myself again'_

And only a few seconds after that she fell and for a moment he thought she would stop again, but she just resumed with a different move. She was crawling, arching, pushing herself up, bending, turning, jumping, letting herself fall, punching the floor and ended up curled into a ball as the song finished.

It was awfully quiet as he watched her lying there. His heart beating in a strange rhythm. It hurt. He didn't know what hurt, but it did and he couldn't do anything about it.  
She was lying there, trying to curl up even smaller, as quiet sobs drifted up to him. She was crying, making herself as small as she could with her arms wrapped around her - trying to hold herself together.

He remembered the burn in his eyes, the tickle down his cheek, that tight knot in his chest. He wanted to help. To go over to her and wrap her in his arms, holding her until she couldn't cry anymore. To tell her everything and nothing. But he couldn't. He could do nothing for her.

It was all so wrong.

He didn't know a thing about her and still felt like he knew her forever. He knew it was wrong to watch her like this, to watch her in such a private moment, but he couldn't look away. He just couldn't.

How could he feel with her, when he didn't even know what had happened? He wasn't an emotional person and even less perceptive like that.

It wasn't right.

She was breaking, and he felt himself break with her.

He couldn't do this anymore. Not after seeing her like that. Not after seeing her fall into pieces with no chance for him to help her in any way. He had to stop. Stop watching her. Stop running to the window as soon as he closed the door after him. Stop being happy when he got a glimpse of her.

And still he watched her. The whole time until it was too dark for him to see anymore.

She had fallen asleep. Crying. Alone on the floor of an empty room. Clutching herself.

And he couldn't remember what had happened after this. Did he eat? Did he go to bed? When had he closed the window? Did he sleep at all? How did he get to work?

It had been nearly four weeks since then. Nearly four weeks since he started to take on more jobs. To spend as less time at home as he could. To work himself so tired, he wouldn't have the energy to think about it anymore and would fall asleep as soon as his head touched his pillow.

It doesn't always work. Sometimes he recalls that day without him even trying to. He remembers everything and sometimes it even triggers that burn behind his eyes, giving him dreams of imperfect perfect movements and a song he hated and couldn't hate at all.

He sighs and his manager hears him. Ren knows it isn't fair to him. He has more work since then, too. Is tired as well and doesn't even know why.  
But he can't tell him. Can't tell him what happened. To him. That day.

So he concentrates on the traffic, trying not to remember and doesn't give an answer.

 


	3. Chapter 3

**"There is something off, Sakurai. Those deaths have something in common and I will find that damn connection."**

**\- "Takaya and Souma were suicides. They don't have a connection to the others or anything for that matter."**

**"They weren't! No one planning on suicide would buy that much fresh vegetables and meat. Or that Takaya; why would he make appointments with his dentist and his hairdresser only a few hours before he decides to hang himself? That's not logical!"**

**\- "Suicide is never logical, Kurata. Well, at least not for normal people. You can't take a look in their head. Maybe it was just on the spur of the moment."**

**"'On the spur of the moment?' They didn't think: 'Hey, what a wonderful day; let's kill myself!' and then went on and did it. They didn't have a-"**

**\- "Stop it! You know where they lived; high up in those expensive buildings with no way to get around the CSS and there was no one on the footage even near their apartments at that time. It was suicide in both cases, period."**

**"Exactly! There was no one near who could have heard … … …"**

**\- "Kurata?"**

**"..."**

**\- "Kurata?!"**

**"I think I know how they did it. Call you back later." Ending the call, he ran after the only person who could help him right now.**

"Cut!" The director calls and everyone stops with what they were doing, waiting for the next command. "Looked alright now. Take a break everyone."

With that everyone not having to put something away, gets off the set and out of the way for those who do.

"I think this time he liked it." His manager tells him, as they meet on the side of the set.

"You said the same the last two times already, Yashiro-san."

"The best things come in threes."

"You do know, this was take number eleven, right?" Taking the bottle his manager hands him, Ren thanks him with a nod and takes a sip of the water.

"Yeah, but this time it was good." Yashiro looks around as if he is searching for something.

"With the timing and all. Oh! Kotonami-san!" He calls to the actress walking past them. She turns to him, showing no expression except a slightly raised eyebrow.

"Good job." Yashiro says, a genuine smile directed at her. But the moment those words leave his lips her glare couldn't be more threatening. Without a word she resumes her way towards her trailer, letting the bespectacled man to watch her strut away.

"That was so totally the wrong thing to say to her, Yukihito-kun."

Both men turn to greet the actress's manager. "Hello Shinjo-san."

"Hello Tsuruga-san." She bows slightly and addresses then her colleague. "Kanae-chan is a bit miffed at the moment."

Yeah right, because 'miffed' is the perfect word to describe that death- glare just now, Ren wonders. Though, when you think about it Kotonami-san isn't called an 'Ice Queen' for nothing. Being cold and dismissive is her default mode. She still is a hardworking actress with a lot of talent though.

"She and her martial arts coach don't get along very well," she continues, "and now the thing with her stunt double. She is a bit behind with her training in parkour anyway and now she won't get any until Honda-san recovers or they find a surrogate."

"Ugh, right. I forgot. How is Honda-san doing?"

"They needed to screw her collarbone together, apart from that it's just bruises and scratches. Still it will take a few months till she can work again."

"Months?" Yashiro exclaimed. "Poor girl. But they'll need to find a replacement in the meantime. They can't possibly postpone filming that long."

"No." She shakes her head. "That's why they try to get one from overseas, but it's not easy to get one on this short notice. And even then a lot of Korean and Chinese girls are too small, whereas Europeans are too tall or the proportions are way too off."

"And why don't they hire a man?" Yashiro wonders. "I mean, the face won't be seen anyway and in movement you won't notice if the curves are real or not, right?"

"I think a stuntman would be the last option for the director." Ren chimes in. "As much of a perfectionist as he is, he wouldn't be able to ignore the difference in movement."

"Is it that obvious?" Yashiro asks, getting a confirmative nod in return. "Hmm, and they probably can't take it out of the script, can they?"

"Yukihito-kun," the manager chuckles, "did you read the script? Or the books for that matter? Without that parkour-thing the story would be a completely different one."

"Of course I read the script!" The fair haired manager answers defiantly. "Well, skimmed it." He admits sheepishly. "But It's his fault." A nod in Ren's direction. "I wanted to read the books first, but he wouldn't let me!"

She looks at the actor. "Not done yet?"

He shakes his head in answer. "I read them already, but I need to reread some parts of it."

"I know that feel!" She grins. "It's awesome how perfectly they're written, aren't they. I had to reread so many parts of it. There was so much foreshadowing, but it was just so perfectly hidden; you wouldn't even notice. And then in that one moment … just POW and everything fits so well. And there are things that go through all three books. I'm sure they'll be concluded in the last one. Oh! And you should read some of those fan theories. Crazy things... what some of them predict..."

"... Sounds like they are really good."

"Oh, Yukihito-kun, you have no idea. Those books are within my top ten favourites; each one on it's own place of course." Noticing the look between the man and his charge, she can't help it. "If you want to read them soon, you could ask Kanae-chan. She probably has them memorised anyway."

She seemingly knows how to talk to him. "That I can do." He answers, standing just a bit straighter.

"But not now." She smiles. "She needs to calm down first. Besides she's still waiting for an email from the author."

"Oh right. As the script isn't finished yet, she would be in contact with him as well."

"They are." She confirmed. "But Hori-sensei hasn't answered all day and that's a bit unusual."

That indeed is a bit unusual, as Ren himself is used to getting his answers rarely later than an hour after he sends his emails, regardless of the time.

But what's there to do? Even a famous author has appointments to be at, maybe a job apart from writing and sometimes possibly even a few days off from everything. Sooner or later there will be a reply and if it takes too long, there are still the director and the other scriptwriters to ask.

"Oh! As you mention 'unusual'," Yashiro remembers and turns to his charge, "the president called. He wants to 'collect data' from you later. So he'll presumably crash your fotoshooting."

"The usual then." Ren nods, not even considering to ask what his boss wants from him this time. His manager answers him anyway.

"He said, he wants to, I quote, "deduce the not- existence of his love- life". So, indeed the usual."

~.~

Ren hears the laughter from both managers still hours later ring in his ears, when the reason for that outburst sits right in front of him in one of his monstrous, sparkly Limousines.

Wearing an Ulster coat, a deerstalker cap and smoking a pipe, Ren just wonders where Watson is. For someone like Takarada Lory there is no such thing as an imperfect costume and therefore there has to be an ex-army doctor somewhere to complete his performance.

The man was ranting on about the only thing that ever matters to him.

Love. What else was there to talk about for Takarada Lory?

Isn't it ironic? Sherlock Holmes, a figure of sheer logic, delivering a speech about love and it's powers to heal anything and everything, even though love is one of the least logical things in the world? That's Lory for you. The people at LME probably called him 'Sherlove Holmes' all day... He wouldn't even mind.

Lory talks and talks and talks, but Ren still doesn't know why his boss wanted to meet him so badly. Though with Lory you never know what you're in for. He always starts with something oneself deems rather not so important - ranting on about his favourite subject.

But the moment you let your guard down and your thoughts wander, he goes in for a strike - leaving you confused and vulnerable. Lory's favourite tactic. Ren can't remember it ever failing, at least with him.

"So, you think you're ready?"

Huh? Oh dammit! He got him again and just when he thought about it.

"Of course I'm ready." What a weak counterattack… Especially, since he doesn't know what it is about.

But Lory wouldn't be Lory, if he couldn't read Ren like an open book. "You should listen, when your career is at stake, Ren."

And he certainly knew how to get others attention.

"Earlier today Director Kanemoto Subaru confirmed the remake of the movie 'Kokoro no Hana' and he wants you as the protagonist." Seeing no recognition of any kind in the younger man's face, Lory hands him a script and continues. "It's a heavy love- drama. Pretty popular at it's time. Many well-known actors wanted the part of the main character, but director Kobayashi hardly took risks with his casts and therefore didn't even consider casting anybody who wasn't established in this genre already."

Ren knows his boss wants to tell him something, but he just can't grasp where this is going. He looks down at the script and reads the title printed on the cover 'Hanako'. Still, it doesn't ring a bell. He can't possibly know of every movie currently made in Japan, can he?

"This movie was shot just a few weeks before 'Tsukigomori' was in the works. I remember a certain Hozu Shuuhei, who was rather down as he didn't get the part even though his act in the auditions was one of the most convincing."

Ohh… this is where it's going... "You can't compare a failed audition with being cast without one."

Lory knows pretty well how much 'Ren' wants to surpass Hozu Shuuhei, now better known as Hizuri Kuu - world famous Hollywood actor, action-movie star and father of Hizuri Kuon aka Tsuruga Ren.

"No. You can't." The president admits, looking at the actor appraisingly - studying the mask of neutrality he had perfected over the years. "Shuuhei could have done it, but didn't get the chance. Now you get the chance, but can you do it?"

Takarada Lory knows what to say to get someone moving and Ren doesn't know if he should be thankful for it or hate the man for it. He would try that glare from Kotonami-san earlier, if it wouldn't be so much out of character for the ever nice 'Tsuruga Ren'.

A love- drama… Ren's weak point. After his failing in 'Dark Moon' he hadn't had the chance to act in something similar again and now this… Opening the script he reads the synopsis. There is no point in pondering, when he doesn't know what the movie is about.

Fukusaku Eisuke, 28, hardworking business man. His family is all about money and status. He does rarely anything that's not connected to his work. On a friend's wedding he meets Yosano Hanako, 24, waitress in a café - a girl without status. His family doesn't approve. They marry anyway. But shortly after the wedding Hanako falls ill with an unknown disease. He discovers that flowers seem to be the only thing that keep her alive. Without going to work, spending all his money on flowers and being disowned by his family, he goes broke while watching the love of his life, the only person that ever mattered to him, die.

"What do you think?" Lory asks the moment Ren finishes reading. Better not give him time to get lost in his thoughts.

"Sounds like something Hizuri-san would have loved to do."

"He would." He watches his protégé carefully. "Do you?"

A few years ago Lory had advised Ren against acting in 'Dark Moon' and presumably ruining his career. He had known Ren wouldn't be able to portray a forbidden love like the one between Katsuki and Mizuki convincingly. But the stubborn youth didn't want to listen to him and had to be pulled from the cast after he got himself stuck and couldn't perform anymore. It had been a huge media frenzy.

And even though Lory had threatened Ren with not assisting him, when (not if) he couldn't act it out, in the end he still helped him back on his feet.

Lory knew Ren had never experienced anything as deep as love. You could see it in every single one of the romantic scenes Ren had acted in. He could flirt and seduce just fine, but if it got any deeper - like it did in 'Dark Moon' - he couldn't fool anyone.

But a while ago Lory felt a change in his friend's son. The mask he put on all those years ago, would slip every now and again and there would be a smile, only a small one, but nonetheless real. As if he remembered something beautiful, something that moved his heart - made it beat faster and with more life.

And there were other times, especially in the last few months, when there was pain in those eyes.

Oh, Lory had seen pain in the young man's eyes before. A broken pain. A guilty pain. But now it's a different kind.

It's anguish and sadness.

Like heartbreak.

As if he had finally found love, just to lose it again right away.

If that was true, wouldn't he be perfect for that role?

"I need to read it first." Ren answers, looking from the script to Lory and then right past his boss.

Exactly the answer Lory had expected. "Obviously. But do you think you can handle it?"

'Did you learn from your mistake?' Is what he really wants to ask..., Ren thinks, staring into the dim moving nothingness behind the window.

He did. Ren had learned, that he can't portray love. That he can't convince anyone of his shallow act. He never was in love before. Never had fallen for someone so hard, it didn't matter if he looked stupid.

How could he portray something as complex as love without ever having been one of it's victims?

He had learned that love is more than his little infatuation with that girl. It couldn't have been love. It was solely based on looks, on her appearance, her mesmerising movements. Those bewitching golden eyes.

He didn't know her. Didn't and doesn't know anything about her. Except she smiles at strangers and sums classical music while grocery shopping. She likes to dance without shoes, in a flowy dress that lives her movements, with her hair up in a high ponytail - similar to that woman on the sidewalk there. But as graceful as she is, she wouldn't stumble around like that. Wouldn't need to support herself against the wall - hunched like this…

"Stop the car!"


	4. Chapter 4

"Stop the car!" Ren screams, shocking his boss and the driver with his sudden outburst.

"Stop it!" He jumps to the car door and before it even stands still he is out of the vehicle and runs across the street, dodging cars, speeding down the sidewalk and searching.

They couldn't have been that far away yet. Or could they?

She has to be here somewhere. But where?

Where is she? He looks around frantically. He runs further down the street.

Crossroads. He saw her just before the crossroads. He speeds up. He sees the traffic lights from afar.

Red. Not far. Just a bit further.

It turns green as he is already halfway across the street. She is still there. Leaning against the building as if she could collapse anytime.

And she does. The moment he reaches her she slumps down.

Ren doesn't know how, but before she can hit the ground he is holding her in his arms.

How many times did he dream of this? Holding her so close to him. But not like this. Never like this.

His heart is beating so fast and he doesn't know if it is from running, from holding her or because of her appearance.

What happened?!

He can't think clearly. What to do now?

Movement in the corner of his eyes. Lory's limousine.

Picking her up, he runs over to the open door. He isn't even at the car yet as he calls "Hospital!" Making the driver run back to his place behind the steering wheel.

"What is going on?" Lory asks shocked and concerned at the same time. He closes the door after Ren and watches him placing the girl carefully on one of the leather-covered benches.

"We need to go to the hospital!" Is the only thing Ren answers not looking anywhere but her.

They both suck in a breath as they see her in the dim light of the car.

Blood everywhere. Bruises. Her dress stained and tattered. A large wet spot on her stomach.

Does she breath? Ren doesn't know. He takes her hand. It's cold. Wrist. Pulse. Where is the pulse?!

No! Other side. Always on the side of the thumb.

Where is it? There! It feels weak. Does it feel weak? He doesn't know! What to do?

He looks her up and down. Angry. The spot on her stomach looks angry. Why does it look angry?

He tears on the shreds. Oh god! Blood. So much blood. From where?

A gash in her stomach. It looks deep. Is it deep? Blood. Too much blood!

What to do? What to do?! Stop the bleeding! How? Pressure. With what?

He looks around frantically. Champagne. Cloth around the bottle. Lory has the same idea.

Ren snatches it from him as soon as he is in range. Press on the wound. Stop the bleeding.

Is she still alive? Where is her pulse? He grabs for her wrist. Is it still there? Is it? Where is it?

There. It's still there. Still weak. But there.

What now? Hospital! Why aren't we in the hospital yet?

"Hospital!" He screams again, not taking his eyes off her still form. "Why aren't we in the hospital yet?!"

Lory doesn't know what to do. What to say. How to help.

He looks between the unconscious girl and the man he thought he knew so well. He had never seen him like that. Never thought he would see an expression like that on the young man's face. Never thought he would see him panicking - all the blood drained from his anxious face. Breathing like he is about to collapse himself.

Rising from the edge of his seat, Lory goes to the front of the car. "How long do we need?" He asks the driver, watching their surroundings - trying to figure out where they are.

"I estimate about six minutes to Sugimoto hospital, President."

Sugimoto? Private clinic. Good.

Lory hadn't thought so far.

The General Hospital would've probably been a bit closer, but they can't just walk into a busy public hospital with an unconscious bloody girl in Tsuruga Ren's arms.

Especially not the way the actor looks right now. Especially not the way he looks at her.

The media would have the day of their life tomorrow.

And that girl would never have a normal life again. If she survives this, that is…

He looks back at the frightened man and the girl under his hands.

She has to survive this. For the love of Love! She has to survive!

Lory doesn't want to imagine Ren if she does not. It would break him. Probably for good this time.

Whoever this girl was, she had to be the one. The one who changed Ren. The one to thaw the boy's barriers. The one to get to him.

But when? And where? And how?!

The actor barely has time for himself. Rarely does anything other than work. When would they have time to meet? How did they met?

Why doesn't he know anything about this?!

"Two minutes, Sir."

Right. He needs to concentrate on the now. His questions will have to wait a little longer. He goes back to his seat, watching them both carefully.

"We'll be at the hospital in a minute. How is she doing?"

Ren looks so pale. "I don't know…" Lory can't remember him ever being so pale. "So much blood…"

He keeps on staring at her. Staring at her face. As if he is trying to force her to open her eyes.

If this goes on any longer the boy runs the risk of getting into shock. They can't let that happen. He wouldn't get him out of it. They have to hurry and get help.

She has to make it.

Lory grabs her hand, searching for a pulse. It's there and it doesn't even feel weak.  
He compares it to his own. No, it's not weak. This girl is a fighter. She will make it. He is sure of it.

"She will make it, Ren." He tries to reassure him, but it doesn't seem he was heard.

"We arrived!" Calls the man from the front.

The limousine comes to a halt and Lory jumps to the door before the driver is even out of his seat.  
They exchange a brief look and the man is running into the building without a word - trying to get help.

"Ren. We're here."


	5. Chapter 5

It's the first time he looks away from her for more than a second, since he brought her into the car.  
A last little press on the blood-soaked cloth and he is carefully picking her up. Carrying her bridal style with her head resting on his shoulder, he tries to stretch the wound as little as possible. As soon as Ren is out of the vehicle Lory presses the cloth back down, taking no risks.

The staff rushes towards them the moment they step into the brightly lit hall. Ren lays her down on the stretcher as cautiously as even possible and gets slowly pushed away by one of the nurses.

It doesn't seem to register in the man's mind.  
His eyes won't leave her in all the time they need to check for her vital signs until they move her through one of those emergency doors and out of his sight. But even then he keeps on staring at the door through which she had just vanished.

"Excuse me." A nurse with a clipboard in her hands looks at the three men, probably trying to decide who would be the most reliable one. Between a pale, bloodstained man staring into nothingness, a man dressed like Sherlock Holmes and a man who looks like a butler, staying a few steps to the side, she tried her luck with the man in the strange coat.

"Can you tell me what happened, Sir?"

"I'm sorry, miss. But we just found her like this, put her into the car and drove here."

"So, you don't know who she is?" A frown appears on her forehead.

"I don't." Lory turns expectantly to his protégé. "But he does. Ren?"

There is no reaction.

Did he go into shock after all? "Ren?" Lory asks a bit louder, worried.

He blinks a few times before he turns to his boss. "Hmm?"

At least he is responsive. "The hospital staff needs to know, who she is. Can you tell them her name?"

Ren's eyes stay on Lory for a few seconds, trying to comprehend what was said, before he turns his attention to the waiting nurse.

"I don't know." He answers, shaking his head slowly.

"What do you mean, you don't know?" Lory frowns aghast. "You jumped out of a driving car as you saw her on the sidewalk! Of course you know her!"

This got the attention from the nurse. "Sir?" She looks Ren up and down. "Are you hurt?"

"No. I'm fine." He answers her and turns to his boss. "I mean, I don't know her name."

Lory wouldn't believe him. Not with the way he had looked at her. "But you do know her?"

"Yes… No…" He sighs and rubs his face with his hand. "I don't know her name. But I've seen her before... a few times."

Ren and love at first sight? Lory surely wouldn't have put him in that box.

"So you don't know what had happened to her and you don't know who she is?" The nurse chimes in. "Is that correct?"

"It seems." Lory answers, not taking his eyes off of Ren.

"Then we will send her to the General Hospital after she has been stabilised."

"That won't be necessary." Lory looks at her. "I'll take over the expenses."

She looks surprised for a moment, before she nods in acknowledgement. "Very well. Would you please follow me. You will need to fill in a few forms." A short nod to his always helpful aid and he follows the woman to the front desk.

"Tsuruga-sama, would you like to sit down?"

Without a word Ren follows him into the waiting area, getting lost in his thoughts the moment he sits down.

Heavy. Why does he feel so heavy now? Shouldn't it be the other way around? Shouldn't he feel lighter now that he isn't carrying her anymore? Lighter, now that he knows there are competent people to help her. But somehow her weight is missing.  
And she had felt so light. Is it normal to be so light? Or was it just his panic and he didn't really register anything else?  
Though she looks so delicate, when she is dancing. In those flow-y dresses, with the pretty fabrics flying all around her.  
That dress - the reason he had recognised her. It had been his favourite. So pretty shades of green dancing around her, like fairies in a sunlit clearing in the forest.  
It is her 'happy-dress', at least that is what he thinks of it. Her dancing was always so alive, so bright and light when she chose it. A being-in-a-good-mood dress. She had been happy today - she wouldn't have picked it otherwise.

But now it's nothing more than scraps of fabric defiled with her own blood.  
She had been happy. So happy that she even left her apartment in that dress.  
But someone had destroyed it. Had destroyed her fairy tale.  
Why would someone do this to her? Who would hurt her like this. Was it an attack from some bad guy and she could somehow escape? Or was it because of her work, whatever it is she does?

A sudden blinding light right in his eyes brings him back into reality. He jerks away and stares at the man crouching in front of him.

"Hello Tsuruga-san. My name is Kameda. Can you tell me where you are?"

For a few seconds he is just staring at the man in the white coat. "In the hospital."

"Good. And do you know why you are here?"

"I caught her. She's wounded... So much blood." Not really hearing what he's saying, realisation hits him suddenly. "Where- How is she?"

"She will be fine. The cut in her stomach looks worse than it is. We're doing a few tests now that she is sedated to see if there are any other injuries."

Ren is still for a moment, thinking. "When it isn't so bad, why did you need to sedate her?"

Dr. Kameda exchanges a brief look with Lory before he answers. "Sometimes when a person wakes up from unconsciousness, they are disoriented and start to fight off the people who try to help them. She woke as we stitched the cut. We had to sedate her before she hurt anyone or herself even more."  
Though normally we don't need seven people to hold one small woman down, but Kameda wasn't about to tell him that.

"Could you take a look at Ren now, Sensei? We don't need him to go into shock." Lory chimes in.

"There's no need. I'm fine."

Both men look at him rather unbelieving. "Ren." Lory's lecturing voice - Ren recognises. "You sat there more than half an hour. No reaction whatsoever. You still haven't cleaned yourself up and you're pale as a sheet."

Half an hour? Has it really been that long? In the car it had felt like they have been on the way for hours. And now it was like not even a minute has passed. He looks down at his hands and sure as hell they are stained with dried blood. Her blood, he remembers.

He pulls himself out, before he can get lost in his thoughts again.

"Where can I wash my hands?"

The sight in the mirror is worse than what Lory described. Not only is he pale as a ghost, there are blood smears on his face and neck.  
His shirt. He can only be lucky that he chose a black one that morning or people would think he is a mur-  
He scrubs his skin until it's clean and a bit more, stopping only when his hands start to hurt.

Yeah… right… he is totally fine. Every normal person scrubs his hands until the skin is raw.

In the end the doctor still wants to check him. But he finds nothing that a full night of rest can't heal.

So, obviously Yashiro needs to be called to push back Ren's schedule for at least half a day.

After the doctor leaves them to check on her, Lory scrutinises his protégé again. "How do you know her?"

"I told you already. I don't."

"Don't give me that. You have to. How else would you have recognised her. In a driving car, at night, with her in that state? It could've been anyone."

… "Maybe she is anyone... Maybe I mistook her."

"Maybe you did." Though Lory doesn't believe him for one second. Not with how he had looked at her face - silently begging her to open her eyes. "How do you know her then? The girl you think she might be."

Ren sighs. "She is a neighbour. I met her in a grocery store a while back."

Lory waits for more. "And then?"

"Nothing then. I never talked to her. Just saw her a few times sitting in a café or walking on the street."

"That still doesn't explain how you recognised her."

No, it does not. But Ren isn't in the mood to tell him the truth. He surely will never be in the mood to tell Lory about how well he knows her dresses. How many times he had seen her in that one dress.  
He had seen it often enough, that even from such a distance in only the streetlights he knew something was off with it - with her. And before he could think it over he was out of the car and running down the street, not noticing anything except what he had needed to find her.

But now that he thinks about it… Was it really her? He hadn't seen her in… what? Two months? Three? He doesn't remember anymore. Doesn't want to remember.

Maybe she really is just some unlucky girl in a similar dress and he had wished for her to be _her._

No.

How could he wish for her something like this? Nobody deserves this.

But is it _her_ or is she someone else? He needs to know. Needs to be sure. Otherwise there would be no way for him to get home and sleep. Or even to work. Nothing that could help him take his mind off of her. Off of the fact that there is a wounded woman in a hospital - alone and unknown by anyone - and it could be _her_.

He needs to see her eyes. It's the only way for him to be sure. He would recognise those golden eyes everywhere.

"I need to see her." He says to no one in particular, though Lory is the only one in the vicinity to hear him. "I need to see if it's really her."

Lory wonders just how far this boy is gone by a girl he claims not to know.  
But be that as it may, if there is Love, especially involving Ren, there isn't much that the Ambassador of Love wouldn't do to see it bloom.

So, he signals his loyal aid to get the doctor for him.

"And what will you do, if it is her?"

Ren stares him right in the eyes, thinking. Hard.

Yeah… what will he do if _she_ is the one lying in that hospital bed?  
If it's _her_ being wounded and alone.  
Always alone.  
Just like him.  
But he deserves to be alone.  
He needs to be punished.  
But she doesn't.  
So what would he do?

"Nothing." Is what he answers. And he means it.

"Ren. This could be the start of a wonderful love story: A girl hurt and alone wandering the streets at night. You catching her as she faints, saving her from a tragic fate. You could be her knight in shining armour fighting the evil that tries to take her. And the both of you would live a happily ever after."

Shocked silence falls for a whole minute between the two men, before Ren even thinks of answering.

"I. Will. Not." He can't even say it as appalled and disgusted as he feels in that moment.

… "Spoilsport." That of course doesn't mean Lory gives up. Not when it's about Love. Not when it's Ren.

They need to wait at least another hour until they can see her.

It feels like waiting forever for one of them. It's not enough time to scheme for the other one.

Ren's feet become heavier with every step he takes, following the two men through the corridors.

Does he really want to know if it's her? And if, will he be able to stand the sight of her pale form in a white bed supported from the machines all around her? Not being able to do anything than stare at her? Was there even anything he could do? Or would do. Would want to do?  
Except the things he knows he shouldn't... couldn't... wouldn't do…

They stop on a corner, Lory and the doctor discussing something Ren hadn't paid attention to.

"It's the the room right there." Kameda says to him, motioning to a door a bit down the hall and turns back to Lory.

Ren walks the last few steps alone. Still heavy steps. Unsure. Agitated. Nervous.  
Standing in front of the door, one hand on the handle, he takes deep breaths. Bracing himself for the impact.

His mind can't comprehend what he sees inside. It doesn't make sense.

Pain in his chest. Not being able to breath. There is a split second, when everything goes black, but he keeps standing. And then it's sheer reflexes on his part.  
Until she is in his arms again and he hears himself calling for help.


	6. Chapter 6

It had been the second time that he had caught her.  
The second time that night he had held her.  
And the second time in only a few hours that he had had her blood on his hands.

Ren lies in a room right next to the one he had been in not so long ago, Dr. Kameda palpating his chest.  
It hurts - a lot.  
The skin right below his sternum is already turning purplish-blue… from just one hit.  
That single strike had made him breathless and unsteady on his feet. His mind went blank as the panic had hit him.  
It had taken him quite some time until he could focus again and was able to describe what exactly had happened.

He had opened the door hesitantly - not sure what to expect.  
Uncertainty flooded his body. Did he really want to see her helplessly lying in a bed, maybe even depending on machines? Her skin ashen from blood loss and the harsh lights hospitals always seem to have. There would be bruises all over her face and body from whoever had done this to her.

...

But had there even been wounds on her face? Blood? Or dirt?

He had stared at her for so long in the car, so intensely, but he couldn't remember a thing.  
No. That's not true. He remembered one thing… the angry wet spot on her stomach. The cut severing her skin across her belly like an evil smirk.  
Calling to him. Taunting him.  
He could lose something important. Something that wasn't even a part of his life. And it would hurt.

But whatever he had imagined seeing there, it certainly wasn't her standing in the middle of the room looking like a deer caught in the headlights.  
Still, there she had been.  
They had looked at each other with wide eyes, shock on one side and surprise on the other's.  
Long before Ren could even start to process what he was seeing, she had hit him in the solar plexus, knocking the wind out of him. Everything went black. He stumbled, but kept upright.  
He remembers blocking and dodging punches she threw at him, though he doesn't know how he did it. All happened so fast.

She wanted to kick him, but lost her footing.  
He had caught her then, only to find her passed out again.  
The moment he had seen red colouring the light blue of her hospital gown, he had called for help.

"That was quite a hit." The doctor says, taking his hand from the forming contusion. "But there is nothing broken or damaged. The pain should be getting better in two or three days." He scribbles something on a clipboard. "The bruise, though... it will accompany you for a few weeks, I'm afraid."

Ren is only half-heartedly listening to the diagnosis. "How is she?"

Kameda sighs. "She tore nearly all of her stitches. The pain... probably the reason she had passed out again. We had to redo them. It won't be pretty, when it's healed."

"Doctor."

"Hmm?" He turns to Lory.

"You said you had to sedate her earlier. So, how can she walk around and attack people, when she should be sleeping?" Lory ponders over this since he had heard Ren explain what had taken place in those few moments.

"Maybe her body has naturally a high tolerance to sedatives." He shrugs. "Or more likely, she could have developed it through constant use. We'll need to run a few tests to be sure. For now we put her into an artificial coma. We can't risk another incident like this. Tomorrow we will contact the police. Maybe they are looking for her already."

"Could we wait until she is awake with that?" Lory asks, getting a frown in response. "If they are searching for her, they will contact the hospitals, won't they? And if not, we could just wait until she wakes and ask her. Whoever did this to her, probably wants to finish what was started."

The doctor considers this for a moment. "You may be right, Takarada-san."

After Kameda handed Ren some painkillers they leave the hospital with the promise, that they would be in contact. The doctor will keep them updated - at least as far as his medical confidentially allows.

They are back in the limousine. Ren deep in thoughts. Lory watching him intently.

"Is she the one?" He asks, without beating around the bush.

Like so many times before at this night, Ren stares his boss right in the eyes before answering.

"She is."

Lory returns the look and holds it. "How do you intend to proceed now?"

They keep on staring. "I told you already. I'm not going to do anything."

Lory doesn't say anything more to him.

Now isn't the right time to talk Ren into something. The actor is too exhausted and way too distrait for any important conversation.  
So, he will need to wait. That won't be a problem - gives him more time to grasp the whole situation and work something out. He needs to. There is no way Lory would let a chance like this pass.  
It's the first time for Ren after all. The first time for him to fall in Love. To have serious feelings towards another person. The first time for him to drop the charade - to let the mask of 'Tsuruga Ren' slip.  
It fell and got a crack.

Even if he picks it up again, it will never be the same.  
Ren will need to put a lot of work into it, if he still wants to use it. Will need to treat it with great care, so it doesn't break completely. Be careful with it, so no one can see the flaw.

Even though it isn't a flaw.

It's a chance. A step in the right direction.

It will make him better. A better actor. A better man.

He will need to take the mask down, if he wants to grow. The 'Tsuruga Ren' he is right now will never be able to surpass his father. Or even reach him.  
He needs to accept who he is and who he was. To learn from his mistakes so he won't repeat them, but can use the experiences to his own advantage. It will hurt. And it certainly won't be easy. But that's the point.  
You need to overcome yourself, if you want to get better - to _be_ better. You need to rise above your old self.


	7. Chapter 7

There are people around her. A lot of them.  
She can feel them, hear them, smell them.  
Even before she can pull herself far enough out of the unconsciousness to actively identify her surroundings.

There is a lot of noise. Muted, but getting clearer.  
The talking, the shuffling, scratching, metal on metal, a beeping sound.  
They are talking urgently, but what they say she can't make out.

There is pain too. Pain is good. Pain means she is alive.

Beep... ... ... Beep... ... ...

The pain grabs at, pulling her back into reality, pushing her up through the layers.

Beep... ... ..Beep... ... ..

A throbbing in her ankle. Not nice, but not severe.  
The stomach is worse. A smarting wound. Pressure. Something is piercing right into the cut.

Beep... ... .Beep... ...

Bright lights above her.

It's so loud.

Male voices, female voices - a jumbled mess.  
The beeping is getting faster. Beep... ... Beep... ..Beep... .Beep...

A moment when the voices stop, when everything stops.

Beep... Beep...Beep...

They're coming closer, talking to her.

She opens her eyes, but can't see. It's so bright. Too bright. She can't identify the people, the place.

She tries to sit up.

They push at her, holding her down.

She grabs the hand from her shoulder and twists it around. A scream rings through her ears.  
More hands to push at her, trying to keep her down.

Blurry faces. Loud voices.

She is kicking someone in the chest. Another one gets hit in the stomach.

All look the same.

They scream for help. It's loud. So loud.

She's trying to wrestle out of their grip, but too many hands are restraining her movements.

A strange taste in her lungs. A heavy taste, pulling her down from within.

Oh, she knows this feeling. Knows it all too well.  
They're sedating her.

Or at least trying to.

Playing along, she stops fighting and lets her muscles relax. Deep breathes - quiet and steady.  
The beeping slows down.

Gradually the pressure eases off. The hands leave her body - one after the other.

Relieved voices ring through the room.

She will pretend to be asleep, letting them think the drug took her out. Resting her body. Saving up energy.  
Until they leave her alone.  
As soon as there isn't anyone around her anymore, she will vanish into thin air. Like she has never been here, in this hospital...

A hospital. Of all places...

Who would've brought her here anyway?

Surely not those guys. They won't be able to move for a while. And even if, helping her would be the last thing on their minds.

She can't remember much from that fight.  
She had kicked one in the head, sending him headfirst into a wall. But her footing was wrong and she had twisted her ankle.

And then? What had happened then?  
Came the knife before or after that kick? And what had happened to the other guy? Did he run? Did he attack her? Or had he been on the ground already?

She remembers walking away from that place. Or rather stumbling.  
But where did she go? Where had she wanted to go and how far did she come?

She had been tired. Everything had felt so heavy. She wanted to sleep so badly.

And now she is here. In some hospital. Needing help.

She can't remember ever even being in one, let alone needing one.

Stupid girl! Why had she been so careless?  
She had been upset - her emotions in turmoil, right, but she hadn't trusted a single one of them in years, let alone two. So why now?  
Normally she knows better than to trust people. Especially people she knows.

...

They dress her in something else, lift her onto a bed and wheel her through the corridors into an elevator. Three or four floors she guesses.  
Hard to tell, when the nurses are constantly gossiping - loudly.  
It takes another few corridors and the nurses doing things around her before she hears a door closing.

Silence.

No beeping, no rustling, no breathing around her. Nothing.

Not taking any chances she stays still for a little longer.  
When she is certain that there is no one in the room with her, she quickly scans her surroundings and sits up, wincing.

Lifting the hospital gown, she examines the bandage on her stomach. A big white plaster to cover the wound - she pulls half of it off.  
So the cut was deep enough for stitching, but not too deep to need surgery. That's good.  
It had been hard to tell the moment that knife had sliced through her. But as it is, it will only be another scar on her body.

She notices the IV still connected to her arm and removes it. Pressing the fabric down on the small red dot she looks around.

She is in a one-bed room with green walls, white sheets, a closet, two doors - the wide one surely leading to the hall, white curtains.  
A window.

Her route to get out of this place.

Getting up from the bed, she staggers to the closet in hope of finding something less noticeable than that gown.  
They had overlooked her ankle. Unfortunately. She will need to stabilise it before she can even attempt to climb out that window.

Halfway across the room - the door opens.

A tall man - seemingly surprised to see her there.

It takes her only a second to recover.

She is right in front of him, lands a hit in the middle of his chest and pulls him into the room. He stumbles a few steps but doesn't go down.

She goes for his kidney, but he intercepts the blow.

A fighter. Damn!

She needs to knock him out. Fast.

But he dodges and blocks everything she can throw at him.

It's getting harder.

Hurry up!

Twisting around she is about to knee him in the groin as the last of her stitches finally give in.

Time's up!

Last option: kicking his head.

No time to right her footing.

Placing her weight on the hurt foot, she barely moves before her ankle gives in.

Pain shoots through her like an electric shock.

Darkness engulfs her before she can see it coming.


	8. Chapter 8

It has been eleven days since that incident and the bruise on Ren's chest is still fairly visible. But even though it is nothing more than a discolouration on his skin, Lory insists on a checkup with Dr. Kameda.  
If he doesn't visit the clinic today there would be no need for him to get out of bed for the next weeks. Lory's words.  
And Takarada Lory does not make empty threats. He probably would cancel all of Ren's jobs personally. Smiling happily while doing so.

Staying at home and having all that time to think about … … ... things... just doesn't look like anything Ren could handle at the moment.

He hasn't tried to handle anything but his job in a long time.

So, now he is here, in the one hospital where he didn't want to go back to, "coincidentally" running into his boss.

...Right. Totally a coincidence...  
And since he is here anyway, why doesn't he come with them and visit the unnamed patient? The one he so heroically had saved. Wouldn't that be nice?

"How long has she been awake now, Doctor?" Lory asks as they walk through the corridors, Ren trailing behind.

"We had her in artificial coma for 32 hours, but because of her unusually high tolerance we had to use rather strong medication. So for the last nine days she was in and out of consciousness - barely registered anything. She's responsive since yesterday."

"And how is she?"

"Her right ankle is healing, as is the cut on her stomach. The stitches will be removed tomorrow. Otherwise she had only a few scratches and bruises, nothing serious."

"Good." He adds pondering. "Did she tell you her name?"

"Only 'Kyoko'. She refused to disclose anything else. Though I haven't really tried questioning her yet, given the circumstances."

"I understand the police didn't search for her?"

Kameda doesn't answer directly, giving the conversation a strange pause. "The police didn't. No."  
They stop right in front of her door, the doctor turning around with a serious expression. "There have been two men asking about her though." Lory raises an eyebrow.

"Just a few hours after you left. They were looking for their runaway sister. Described her exactly. Talked about why she had run off and how worried they were." He looks from Lory to Ren and back again. "But there was something clearly off with them. They didn't seem worried at all. And they wouldn't tell me their names or even hers. Saying their sister is never telling anyone her real name."

"That sounds suspicious indeed." Lory ponders in what this girl… in what 'Kyoko' has gotten herself into. "What did you tell them?"

"That there wasn't a patient who would fit their description and that I would call them, if she showed up. They left a phone number and walked off."

"Do you still have that number?"

"It's in her-" In that moment the door opens and a nurse greets them. "It's in her file." The doctor finishes and turns to the nurse. "How is she?"

"Better. She recognizes me since yesterday and this morning she asked when she will be allowed to leave."

"Good." He answers and steps to the side to let her go. Nodding at the two men Kameda turns and walks into the room - Lory following him without the slightest hesitation.

It's not as easy for Ren.

For a few moments he just stands there staring after his boss, not being able to move in either direction.

Walking away is what he should do. Not for the sake of his job obviously. Because, let's face it, the bruise on his chest isn't the reason Lory wanted him at the hospital. Never was.

His boss has ulterior motives - like he always does.

But staying? Going in there and being able to see her up close? To hear her voice?  
He fought the last few months to not even look out of that window. It was hard. Coming home, he saw it every single time. And no matter how tired he had been, there wasn't a single time when he didn't think about taking just one small glance. And now he has to go into that room? That's not fair! It's so not fair!

Because he desperately wants to see her just as much as he doesn't.

In the end there is nothing for him to decide.

He hears the doctor say something and the second that lovely voice reaches his ears, his long legs carry him into the room before he can even make a conscious decision about it.

Her eyes flicker towards him the moment he comes into her line of vision. It's not the way he had expected. It feels rather strange. Unsettling.

Any other person he met would stare at his face, looking for the smallest emotional reaction to work with - just like normal people do.  
Or maybe they would check his body out.

But she… her eyes go from his face to both hands separately to a once-over and all in a split of a second.  
He knows this kind of look.  
It's the one you give people who could be a potential threat.  
And he doesn't like how used to it she seems. As if it's the most normal thing to judge a person for the grade of danger they could be to you.

"I would like to introduce you to these two gentlemen, Kyoko-san." Dr. Kameda says, indicating first to Lory, "Takarada-san. He was so kind to offer to pay for your treatment," and then to Ren, "and Tsuruga-san. He was the one who found you."

Looking at Lory she bows as good as she can while sitting in a bed. "Takarada-sama. I am grateful for your kindness and generosity. As soon I will be allowed to leave I will pay you back." Without letting him a chance to counter anything she addresses the other man - again with a bow. "Tsuruga-sama. Thank You for saving my life. I will forever be deeply indebted to you."

Before either man can say anything in return Kameda reminds her of her stitches and that she shouldn't bow or she probably will need to stay even longer. After an apology on her part Dr. Kameda becomes serious. "I have to ask this, Kyoko-san. Do you remember anything from the evening before you were brought here?"

It's like all the friendliness leaves her within a single heartbeat and she looks at him with pretty much no expression on her face. "I do."

"Can you tell me what happened?"

"No."

Kameda considers this for a second. "You can't or you won't tell me?"

"I won't."

"Is there anything I can do to change your mind?"

"No."

He sighs. "Thought that much." With his left hand he takes something out of his coat pocket. Holding up a plastic bag with small silvery items in it he asks her another thing. "Can you tell what those are, Kyoko-san?"

Her eyes don't leave the bag and there sure are shock and disbelief written on her face. "Why..." She touches her right elbow and then her left shoulder. "How many?"

"Six." He takes the clipboard from her bed. "We saw them on the MRI. They took quite a toll on the scanner, so we had to remove them. We found them in the back of both knees, under your navel, right elbow, left shoulder and in the back of your neck."

The moment he finishes her hand goes to the back of her head, looking for the telltale bandage. "... in the hair… bastards…" She mumbles.

"What are those, Kyoko-san?" He tries again, but she won't answer him this time either.

Her eyes flicker to the other two men in the room and clearly only one of them doesn't know what those are.

"When can I leave, sensei?"

"A few more days I'm afraid. We need to remove those stitches first and your ankle isn't healed yet."

"If that's all then I can take care of myself." With that she throws the blanket of her legs and swings them to the side of the bed.

"Is there someone who could watch over you for a few days? Family or friends?"

They don't have a reason to keep her if she doesn't want to, but Dr. Kameda wouldn't feel right letting her go already. Something just doesn't sit right with him. Her situation and those men looking for her...

"I will be fine on my own, sensei. No need to worry. I'm sure you have more important patients to take care of." Slowly sliding of the bed she tries her feet on the ground - the ankle is worse than she thought. Dammit!

"Kyoko-san, I beg you to stay for a bit longer. It's not safe for you out there yet."

Standing a bit wobbly she smiles up at him. "It will never be safe." She bows deeply. "Thank you for taking care of me, Kameda-sensei." It's the first time all three of them notice how small she actually is - how fragile she looks. You wouldn't notice with her being up in that bed and her eyes looking so strong.

"Can I have a private word with you, Kyoko-san?" All eyes turn to Lory.

Kyoko considers what he could want. He isn't as unknowing as the other men, that's fairly easy to see. But she can't tell if he could be a threat to her.  
Is he somehow connected to _them_? Does he know who she is and wants to use her for his benefits?  
He doesn't really seem like it. A nosy show-off. Surely. Intelligent. Certainly. Rich. Obviously.  
But there isn't much malice in him, at least not the dark kind.

And he clearly doesn't want the other two to know what he knows. The question is: Is it for her sake or his own?

Standing completely straight she nods once.

"Sure."


	9. Chapter 9

"So you know as much as I do?" A rather annoyed Kotonami Kanae asks her current companion on the way to a brand new mission designed by their very own boss.

"I was told what to wear and at what time the car would arrive to get me, Kotonami-san. Everything else will be disclosed as necessary. You know his games."

She barely looks at him throughout the ride. Nothing new. She usually stays on her own. "It's the first time for him to use the both of us."

That was true. Lory rarely constructs 'missions' that involve more than one of his 'underlings'.

And yes, even a Tsuruga Ren isn't more than a pawn in the greater game that his boss is playing.

Ren certainly has an idea where they are taken, even if he can't figure out what Kotonami-san has to do with it.  
He suspected it the moment he got the message. And even though he had the last two days to think about the whole situation he isn't a bit closer to anything.  
He doesn't know what happened, he has no idea who she is and although he told Lory again and again that he wouldn't do anything. He isn't so certain anymore.

It's not that he could just walk away. Not from her anyway. But even if he wanted to, really wanted to, Lory has a plan now. And when Takarada Lory puts his mind on something… You know the drill.

There isn't much he can do except play along and look where it takes them. Clearly a sensation he doesn't like.  
For the last years now Ren was calculating all kinds of things. In fact everything he had the slightest bit of control over. Despite repressing the memories with all his might he still remembers the times when he wasn't in control. Not a time he wants to repeat.

So he is trying to think of what is going to happen to him this day. Hard to tell. Since Lory is involved there really isn't much that couldn't happen.  
Well, except maybe that she would throw herself at him. Not that he wants that. Why would he want such a thing?  
After all she isn't what he thought she was like.

...Right?

She is so different to what he had imagined. It's not as if he had a firm grasp on her character after those few minutes in the same room with her. Who could?  
She seemed to be a polite and friendly person. But the moment the doctor asked her about that evening she closed up instantly.  
Not surprisingly, really.  
Given the circumstances everyone would try to forget what had happened. But it wasn't like it would be for 'everyone'. It wasn't  _just one bad thing_  that had happened to her that night. One misfortune that would be a part of her life from now on. Probably even change her.

The way she talked… like her whole life was a bad dream she couldn't wake up from.

' _It will never be safe.'_

Those words still ring in his ears. Branded in his mind.  
Together with that sad, resigned smile on her face as she said them.  
They will be another one of those unwanted trophies inside his head he will have to carry around with him from now on.

And then those things she had under her skin. Things she didn't even know of as it seems.

But she knows the people who did it - the attack, those metallic items. She knows who did those things to her. That much was obvious.

What else had they done to her?

Stop it!

He can't go down that rabbit hole. He wouldn't find the way back out again.

The car stops in a place he is fairly familiar with now. Holding the door open the driver lets them exit the vehicle and gets then back to his seat, waiting for their return.

Takarada's always present aid greets them inside the hospital, awaiting them just far enough from the entrance so they wouldn't be seen from the outside. Following him through the hallways it doesn't take long until they reach the one room Ren would have found even without any help.

Not that Ren hasn't been there only two days prior. He still doesn't know and honestly, can't even imagine what Lory had to say to her that day, but maybe he would find out in a few moments.

Lory sits in a chair in the middle of the place, looking out of the window. He only turns around when the door is closed securely behind them. With her legs dangling from the side of the bed she scans them as soon as they enter the room.  
It's still unsettling.

"There you are." Rising from his position Lory indicates from the sitting girl to the new arrivals. "Kyoko-san, Kotonami Kanae and Tsuruga Ren. They will aid you out of this place."

With a friendly smile she gets down from the bed and bows deeply. "Kotonami-san, Tsuruga-san. Thank you for helping me out. I am grateful for your kind offer and feel deeply indebted to you."

With a deep frown Kanae looks from her to her boss. "What exactly would it be we're supposed to 'aid' here, shachou?"

A smile is playing on his lips. "You see Kotonami-kun, there are people following Kyoko-san around and we need a way to get her out without anybody noticing who she actually is."

Kanae comprehends this for a moment with knitted brows. "You mean I took hours out of my packed schedule to come here and play a walking clothes rack?!"

"So it seems." He says smiling fully at her. She is so quick! One of the reasons why Kanae was one of his best.

She doesn't even glare at him so used to it she is already. Honestly, he had given her way worse "missions" before. This would be a piece of cake compared to some unmentionable ones. "How long do I need to stay?"

"At least an hour I would say."

With a nod she looks around. "Where can I change?"

He motions to the bathroom. "There is a set of clothes prepared for you."

Of course there is. With another nod she turns and walks past her strangely quiet colleague.

"Excuse me, Kotonami-san?"

She stops and turns to the girl. "Hm?"

"Before you change could you show me how you get into a car?"

Three sets of eyes are on her.  
Kanae is confused for a second before comprehending what she wants.  
Lory, calculating something in his head, steps away from the chair to make room for her. This girl is surprising him again and again. And he knows her only for two days!

Kanae finds out that it is surprisingly hard to imagine to get into a car. A chair is not a car seat. And honestly, who thinks about how you enter a car? Except when you wear a certain kind of clothes, but even then, the only thing you do consciously is keeping your knees together or not twisting too much when your dress doesn't have straps. That kind of things.  
She tries it a few times until the girl thanks her with another bow and nice words.

Honestly, when she is about to copy her to get out of here she shouldn't bow that much. Kotonami Kanae is not that submissive or humble. But how would she know? They don't know a thing about each other.

After Kanae is done Kyoko goes changing. She wonders silently how this girl will be able to walk the whole way to the car, since her ankle is still bandaged and she needs to use crutches. They should have told her beforehand what was going to happen, so she could have faked an injury and limped her way to this place.

"How is this supposed to work? She can barely stand, let alone walk. In those boots nonetheless?" Kanae asks looking at her boss. He really should've talked to her before this.

"That won't be a problem, Kotonami-kun. She will use Ren to lean on. A bit crying and people will think you visited a dying acquaintance of yours or the like." Kanae visibly bristled just thinking about such a fake act. Her, doing any of those things in public! And with him! If the media got wind of this whole scheme she would be branded as 'Tsuruga Ren's girlfriend' forever. No Kotonami Kanae anymore, only 'The girlfriend of...' and of course nobody would believe her refusals to be true! All her hard work to be recognized would be for naught!

"That won't be necessary, Takarada-san. I can walk just fine." Kyoko says closing the bathroom door behind her. Walking like there is no problem at all. "It probably wouldn't be a good idea anyway, since Kotonami-san certainly isn't the kind of person to cry in public." All eyes are staring at her again. This time in wonder.

She has completely changed, not only the clothes, but her whole appearance. Her stance, the way she moves. Her aura. It's like there is a different person standing in front of them.  
A person that seems eerily similar to the only other woman in the room.


	10. Chapter 10

"You said Ren-sama would come to visit us, Grandfather!" Maria asks with a pout, her agitation growing. "Why isn't he here yet? Do you think something happened to him? Ren-sama is never late! So there must have been something!"

"Calm down. Nothing happened. They just have to take a little detour. I'm certain they will be here soon."

Lory and Maria are waiting for quite some time already. Lory of course knows that Kyoko and Ren will need a while. Even if the charade had been perfect, they can't say for sure that nobody was watching them.  
And since they can't rule out the possibility that they might be followed, they need to take a more complicated route to get to the mansion.

"You better be right!" She tries to sit still and fails miserably.  
Maria's overactive imagination just won't let her calm down.  
Her paranoia has grown persistently since her mother's death 6 years ago.  
When she was younger her fear only related to airplanes, but now it's getting to involve all kinds of vehicles.  
And at the moment Lory can't do anything to help his beloved granddaughter. She lets no one get close enough, let alone trusts them sufficiently to open up.  
But it's not that she just sits there and  _not talks_  with therapists and the like. No. She actively scares them off. Grown-up, professional doctors refuse to work with a scared child. If it wasn't so bad, he would be proud of her strong will.  
For now Lory just lets her be, in the hope that she will calm down enough one day to see reason.  
He is prepared for a long ride though.

Sebastian appears next to them. "They will arrive shortly."

"There you hear?" Lory asks Maria who had jumped from her position even before Lory's aid had finished to speak. "Let's see what we've got there." He says, following the other two to the parlour.

Lory doesn't even get to sit down again before the voices reach his ears.  
He hears a deep voice saying something and then the rather loud voice of a female, demanding something quite vehemently, but he can't make out what exactly. Maria looks at him confused. Maybe he should have mentioned to her that Ren was accompanying their female guest.  
Or she just hasn't heard her beloved  _Ren-sama_  sounding so annoyed yet.

It's not long before the doors to the underground garage are held open by Sebastian and in comes a sight nobody would have imagined.

A displeased looking Tsuruga Ren with a struggling girl in his arms, carrying her bridal style.

For a split second Lory wonders if that entryway counts as "threshold", but discards that thought right away. For now anyway. Maybe later.

"Tsuruga-san! Please set me down! We're here already! Just put me down! I can walk just fine on my own! Tsuruga-san!" The man in question seems to ignore what she's saying and without a word passes Lory and a stunned Maria. He only stops right in front of the settee to finally fulfill her constant request.

It's not lost on Lory how gently he puts her down even though she tries to fight him off.

"That really wasn't necessary, Tsuruga-san. I can take care of myself." Kyoko says a second later after having calmed down with a slight huff. "But thank you."

He looks at her, all the annoyance had fled from his face in an instant. " You're welcome."

He only allows himself a second to memorise her face before placing her shoes next to her feet on the floor. Straightening up he turns to greet his boss.  
The looks on the faces he encounters could rarely be more different.  
Sebastian isn't showing any expression at all. Maria wears stunned silence mixed with shock and a hint of annoyance. Whereas Lory practically gleams with calculating excitement. Oh, Ren really doesn't want to know what's going on in that head. It's rarely something good.

As Lory introduces Kyoko and Maria with each other, Ren notices that there is something missing. He looks at Maria and only then he realises that she didn't jump into his arms as she normally would.

"Hello Maria-chan. How are you?" He greets the girl.

The look she gives him is one he isn't used to receiving, not from her anyway - a fake smile. "Hello Ren-sama. I'm well, thank you."

Even Lory looks at her oddly. Though he at least has an idea why she behaves like that at the moment.  
As it seems she hadn't missed the expression on Ren's face as he looked at their new guest. It was guarded, no question, but Ren isn't one for lingering glances.

That one did linger.

And Maria is a sharp observer, especially concerning her beloved  _Ren-sama_. The actor hasn't shown interest in a woman as long as Maria knows him. The girl is probably still living her illusion that Ren will one day marry her.  
But now she might have seen something she wasn't prepared for.  
She won't be happy about it, but Lory knows that it will only help her grow. Even if it will take a while. She had lived her illusion for quite some time after all.

"Maria, Kyoko-san will stay with us for a while. I hope you two will get along." Even though he doesn't peg Kyoko as one to get scared off that easily. It wouldn't do anyone any good if his granddaughter started to play pranks on her.

"Can I go to my rooms now, grandfather?" Maria doesn't even wait for an answer. She looks him straight in the eyes and then turns around and walks off.

"Is she alright?" Ren asks surprised. He has never seen her so quiet and reserved before.

"She just needs to work through something. Don't worry." Lory answers. "So, may I inquire why the two of you arrived in such a manner?" He asks, trying to lift the mood.

"I apologise for my poor behaviour and the tumult I caused, Takarada-san." Kyoko is bowing as deep as she can without throwing herself on the floor and for a second Lory doesn't know what to make of her. One second she is this strong woman taking on everything on her own and the next she is meekly bowing to a person she barely even knows. "Tsuruga-san was so kind to help me, since my ankle is still hurting."

Neither man is saying anything to that, since it's technically true. Even if the situation didn't appear to be as harmless.

~o~o~o~o~

_Ren being the stupid idiot he always seems to be around her hadn't thought much of the walk they had to perform to get to the car. He was way too absorbed in his own little problems as they marched down the shiny hospital hallway, out the door and down the three steps to get to the sidewalk.  
He had been so impressed by her act and the way she walked so effortlessly in the same manner Kotonami Kanae always did. If he hadn't known that person to be _ her _, he would have been fooled like everyone else. It wasn't only her appearance, it was in her whole demeanour. She was radiating the same icy haughtiness the real actress exuded normally._

_But he knew and therefore was caught in his sad little mind thinking about her being right next to him._

_And then pondering what he should say to her, trying to remember if he had even greeted her in the hospital room. Or if he had played the silent fool all the time.  
He couldn't tell._

_It was then that the car jerked suddenly. The driver had apologised for not being able to avoid the pothole._

_Only then did Ren look at her without too much overthinking and noticed how pale she was. The way she avoided to put her injured foot down._

_He had asked her then if she was alright, if she wanted anything to drink or if she wanted to get some fresh air.  
Rejecting his offers and saying she was fine was only the beginning of the struggle._

_No matter how often Ren tried to get her to take that shoe off, she declined. It didn't matter what words he chose and how he reasoned it, she wouldn't even drop the act._

_Until finally the point for him came when he couldn't take it anymore. And with the speed and precision of an experienced fighter he carefully snatched the offending item from her foot while apologising profoundly._

_She had asked him only once to give it back and as he refused she looked at him with the most 'Ice Queen'-esque annoyance possible.  
A certain Kotonami Kanae would have been proud._

_If it hadn't been for his quick reflexes he would've probably been knocked out by the other shoe that came flying, but he could dodge it just in time._

" _I don't think they fit you, but when it makes you happy. Keep them. Just stop bothering other people with your little hobby."_

_Ren has been stunned at that moment.  
Was that herself or was she still acting her role? Because that would have been something the original would have said in such a situation. He was so surprised that he had to chuckle. Whereas she ignored him for the rest of the ride._

_When they finally arrived at their destination, Ren was out of the car as soon as it stopped. He waited for her at the car door to help her out, which she - of course - declined. She had barely straightened up as he picked her up and carried her inside. She did not seem to like that._

_Ren was afraid he would hurt her. She was struggling so hard that he had to hold her tighter and with more force than he normally would in such a situation. Not to mention how light she was and how fragile she looked.  
But there was no chance he would drop her - accidentally or otherwise - before they met Lory._

_He figured, if she really wanted to be put down then she wouldn't have a problem to get her will. As strong as she was, she could hurt him quite seriously if she set her mind to it. And since she neither hurt herself nor him, he kept on going until they arrived at the next soft surface._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now that I read that again it actually occurs to me, that the last part sounds a bit... wrong...


End file.
